In the hierarchy of the uncomely, there’s ugly and there’s butt-ugly.
And then there’s something far more hideous.
Knit-ugly.
’Tis the season for sweaters that only a mother could love. Or perhaps a grandmother with very bad eyesight.
It is an odd tradition at the holidays that folks regularly don their most unsightly Christmas sweaters, gather together, and judge one another for it.
And, they have fun doing it.
A half-dozen or so of these ugly sweater parties are planned in the coming week, offering the fashion-challenged among us a chance to shine for fun and prizes. Upcoming local events will include:
Ugly Sweater Party
Wear your favorite ugly sweater to the Striders running store in Ogden and enter to win a gift basket. Also, enjoy hot chocolate while you look for those last-minute Christmas gifts. Sponsored by Striders and Daily Rise Coffee.
Ugly Sweater Party, 4-6 p.m. Friday, Dec. 20, Striders Ogden, 1937 Washington Blvd., Ogden.
Ugly Sweater Party
For those in Davis County who think running to Ogden for the Striders Ugly Sweater Party is a bit too far, they’re holding one at the Layton store, too. Same deal — sport a grotesque sweater for a chance to win a gift basket, and enjoy hot chocolate while you shop.
Ugly Sweater Party, 4-6 p.m. Friday, Dec. 20, Striders Layton, 1776 N. Hill Field Road, No. 4, Layton.
Ugly Christmas Sweater Fundraiser
This abomination-for-a-good-cause features contests, music, food and spirits. Includes tacos from Wimpy and Fritz, beer from Roosters Brewery, and spirits from Ogden’s Own. Prizes will be awarded for ugliest sweater, best “ugliest” couple, and more. The event, hosted by Indie Ogden and The Monarch, is a fundraiser for Your Community Connection.
Ugly Christmas Sweater Fundraiser, 7-11 p.m. Friday, Dec. 20, The Monarch, 455 25th St., Ogden.
Ugly Sweater Party
It’s the second year for Roosters B Street Brewery’s holiday-sweater festivities. Prizes will be awarded to the top three sweaters. The party starts at 6 p.m., with judging at 8 p.m. “Come down for some beers and joy before the holidays,” the invite reads.
Ugly Sweater Party, 6 p.m. Saturday, Dec. 21, Roosters B Street Brewery, 2325 B Ave., Ogden.
Ugly Christmas Sweater Party and Sub-4-Santa
Celebrate the holidays in your worst sweater at Rainbow Saloon. It’s the bar’s biggest night for Sub-4-Santa, raising money to purchase gifts for families who would otherwise go without. Prizes include a big-screen TV, Nintendo Switch, neon signs and more. Raffle tickets are $1 each, or six tickets for $5.
Ugly Christmas Sweater Party and Sub-4-Santa, 6 p.m. Saturday, Dec. 21, Rainbow Saloon, 6045 S. 1900 West, Roy.
Ugly Sweater Apocalypse 2019
Alleged invites patrons to enjoy “several cups of cheer to help you cope with the monstrosity darning your torso,” and suggests, “If you’re lucky someone dressed just as poorly might cringe with you under the mistletoe.” The event includes a photo booth to record the moment for posterity.
Ugly Sweater Apocalypse 2019, 8 p.m. to 1 a.m. Saturday, Dec. 21, Alleged, 201 Historic 25th St., Ogden.
Social Axe Ugly Sweater Party
Sadly, the axe-throwing location in Ogden is not hosting an ugly sweater shindig. But the Salt Lake venue is. So if you’re a local who honed your chopping chops in Weber County, head down south for a night of games, food and drinking, and a chance to bring an ugly sweater trophy back to Ogden. The event includes prizes for ugliest sweater, worst Santa costume, axe-throwing tournament champion, doubles tournament champs, around the world champion, and most cans hit during the evening. Admission cost includes dinner from Shylo’s Mobile Cafe, pictures on Santa’s lap, or a photo banner with props for your own portraits. Cost is $35 for three hours of axe-throwing and dinner. For more info, call 801-486-2937.
Social Axe Ugly Sweater Party, 8-11 p.m. Saturday, Dec. 21, at Social Axe Throwing, 1154 S. 300 West, Salt Lake City.